


Walking the past

by raven_lore



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-15
Updated: 2009-11-15
Packaged: 2017-10-02 21:32:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raven_lore/pseuds/raven_lore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>But she had been. Watching. All of them. What else should she do?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Walking the past

**Author's Note:**

> In response to the sga_flashfic challenge: voyeurism
> 
> Thanks to troyswann for beta reading.

Silently she keeps watching.

He licks his lips, slowly, self-consciously. He is so absorbed, so enthralled by what he is going to do, that he takes her right in with him and, before she even realizes it, she is licking her own lips too. Or, at least, it feels like that.

The desire in his eyes is burning. He has been denied it for so long that it is almost painful.

She wishes she could understand it, remember that craving, but, at the same time, she fears what such understanding would bring upon her. She has heard of many who have fallen, enough to fear that same fate.  
No matter that what she is doing could already be considered a first step towards that same end. She has chosen to ignore that.

Anyway she is just looking, spying maybe, but there is no harm in that, is it? And she is hiding from the others because... because some of them tend to see something wrong wherever they look.

She is not sure she understands them. Is it possible that they never wonder? That they never want to feel once more?

Rodney reaches out to the object of his desire. He grabs it, slowly bringing it to his lips. Given a chance, she would be sitting on the edge of her chair now.

And then Rodney's throat is moving, taking it in and suddenly she does remember how that felt and tries to close eyes that she no longer possesses.

Suddenly the door opens and John comes in, startling them both. She rushes away, hoping that no one noticed her little gasp. The image of Rodney sputtering his precious coffee while John accused him of keeping secret stashes leaves a lingering smile in her mind. That has been good.

Almost as good as seeing Teyla take down John in one of their sparring sessions after he has become a little too confident. Or the time Radek had actually built a toy train for the Athosians kids. Or when Carson and Kate had finally taken a night for themselves, to forget, if only for a few hours, the responsibilities and the worries for their people and they have ended up totally knackered. Who would have thought they both would be so funny once their inhibitions were gone and they believed no one was watching them?

But she had been. Watching. All of them. What else should she do?

Watching. Observing. That is what Ancients and other ascended beings are supposed to do and since she has joined them...

Elizabeth sighs, or, considering her state, thinks of sighing.

How long? How long since she has ascended? She is pretty sure it was some time ago, none the less she is still doing what she has been doing that first day: spying on her people.

She supposes she should be able to do something else by now. There are so many possibilities to explore, things to learn. But she doesn't seem to be able to shake her past off and sooner or later something will happen, something that will call for intervention. What will she do then?

She doesn't know the answer or, maybe, she is merely refusing to acknowledge it.

On the mainland some of the Marines are teaching the basics of football to the Athosians. One thought and she is there too, the future an indistinguishable mass in the shadows of her past.


End file.
